MY VALENTINES

Valentine's day.



A day for lovers to celebrate how in love their lovely love is with each other. If you, like me, are stuck pointlessly fanning the embers of a relationship in its final stages of decay and disillusion, you might be tempted to scorn those who insist on confronting you with their (stuffed teddy flower adorned chocolate based) happiness. Well, don't. I have one word for you.

Friends.

No, seriously. Friends and their friendly friendliness. The one who used to be your bff but now you only speak once or twice a year and she just had a baby so you promise you'll go see her even though you know it'll be a long long while yet. Or the one who really truly knows you inside and out and loves you anyway inspite of your ridiculous self involvement yet wouldn't have you any other way. Let's not forget the other one who holds you to a much higher standard than you hold yourself thus requiring huge amounts of energy and effort to maintain said friendship "faux pas" free. Yes, all of them. My little basts.

Been thinking on friendships recently and consequently have decided this valentine's day will be dedicated to them. In spirit that is. Logistical nightmare celebrating in person. I'm not going to say single ladies forget the men and turn to your friends because let's be honest, neither soothes the loss of the other. However once you see past trying (in vain) to replace one with the other, you realise that each fills a different space in your heart. Each of these compartments have the ability to make you feel just a little less empty inside. You'll start to notice a different kind of happy when you are around your friends. This may not be news to most but it's certainly been news to me.

Don't get me wrong, falling in love with a man is a whole other ballgame. But falling in friend can be just as good. Different, but good. Your friendships won't give you respite from any anxiety or emptiness you may feel about your relationship (or lack of one), but they will force you to look outside of your self even for a split second which is enough to distract you from any sadness or pain you may be feeling.

This year is the year I have truly fallen in love with my friends and it has been truly magical. I would be lost without them and I'm actually not just saying that for once. If you are lucky enough to be surrounded by a fab collection of boy and girl friends, don't forget them this Valentine's day.

If your list is too long (like this post, sorry!), take heed of this very true advice from the ever-wise Buzzfeed crew:

http://www.buzzfeed.com/ariannarebolini/types-of-friends-you-shouldnt-feel-bad-dumping

Xxs



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