HOW NOT TO TINDER



The weekend is almost upon us so I give you this post in homage seeing as the majority of us will no doubt be perusing the app at some point this weekend ;). 


This was his only picture.

This post is interspersed with screenshots of some prize profiles. You will likely be uncomfortable for the duration of this post.

For those who don't know, Tinder is a free app that allows you to meet people based on their gender, distance from you, age, and a few pictures. If you like a profile, you swipe it to the right, if you're not interested you swipe it to the left (Beyonce stylee). The other person doesn't find out you've said yes until they also say yes. That makes them a match and only then can you start a conversation.

This is what that process looks like (nsfw):



I'm one of those girls who doesn't use the app purely for hookups choosing instead to hold out for a connection worth exploring (quality over quantity ppl, recognize). This apparently makes me "boring". Funnily enough, I'm only "boring" to those that are yet to transition from puberty so if being "boring" weeds those fine specimen out then "boring" all day every day lol  :D
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"Genuine" gals only need apply. Apparently.

As with anything that's free, Tinder is subject to misuse. These are my dealbreakers:
  •  Snapchat is NOT a valid form of communication between 2 strangers.
  • Group pictures. Automatic no. Unless everyone in the picture is hot in which case it's yes. You know...just in case lol.
  • Topless selfies.
  • Pouting selfies.
  • Selfies in general. Where are your friends??
  • One picture.
  • Posing with guns/drugs/cash. I'm no prude, if you have it and want to flaunt it then go right ahead. I just won't be dating you lol. 
  • Not smiling. A sure sign of things to come.
  • Pictures of you on your wedding day. Men if you must cheat, be better.
  • Getting to 2nd base with your animals. 
  • Thumb rings. They stress me out for some reason. Unnecessary.

I know it's just a game, whatever. Shtoopidness is shtoopidness lol.
No Rocco.

What nonos have you guys come across? Leave a note in the comments. If together we can affect just one rubbish Tinderling (made that up) then it'll all be worth it. Surely.

Erm..modified basement much?!
Sharing is caring beautiful ppl, can't wait to hear all your stories! And remember, friends don't let friends Tinder sober, it's not good for the soul lol.


Xxs






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